Sitting Down With Entrepreneur and Mom, Alisha Ramos
Today we are so excited to chat with Alisha Ramos, the co-founder of Girls’ Night In and now her new newsletter, Downtime. In our chat, Alisha told us all about life with her dog Bowie and her baby, Lily, what it’s been like building her new newsletter, the best books she’s read this year, and more.
First of all we’ve been following you for a long time and were big fans of your brand, Girls’ Night In. Tell us about your newsletter, Downtime.
Thank you so much. Downtime is my new iteration of Girls’ Night In. I started the former when I was 26 years old and I am now in my thirties; the name no longer embodied what the newsletter had grown to become – it is a little less about literally “staying in” and more about the cozy feeling you get from the small joys in life, whether that’s a really good book or a wonderful piece of life advice you got from a friend. I felt it was time for a change and an evolution - Downtime is that.
Alisha calls her dog, Bowie, “her first baby.” Now she says that he and Lily (above) “are just the cutest together.”
What’s it like launching a new newsletter after the success of Girls’ Night In? We’d imagine it must be daunting.
The most difficult part of this all has been going from working with an incredibly talented team to now running the newsletter solo (aside from my part-time collaborators who help me with partnerships, editing, and design). I am trying to be realistic about my expectations for myself as anyone who has run their own business knows, it’s not easy. Especially as a new mom, I’ve learned to take things day by day and not try to overdo it.
You also have a beautiful one-year old daughter, Lily. What’s motherhood been like so far?
Motherhood has been surprising, beautiful, and challenging all at once. It sounds cheesy to say, but I didn’t know I had the capacity to love someone so much.
Motherhood has also taught me what having *hard* boundaries around work looks like. I consult with consumer brands on the side, and I had a “come to Jesus” moment recently where I was like, “Wait, I don’t have twenty hours a week to devote to this client. It actually looks more like five.” It’s a hard conversation to have with yourself and with others, but I think you’ll be happier once you accept your new reality.
All of this is to say that motherhood has been a revolutionary shake-up of my life. I used to define myself solely by my job, my career, my title. Now it’s something much more expansive. Of course, I don’t believe everyone needs to become a parent to experience this type of expansion. But it’s been a welcome “forcing factor” for me to wake up and build harder boundaries between work and life.
On a lighter note, currently motherhood looks like searching our community for the coolest parks and indoor activities so we can get all of her energy out on the weekends! It’s been a fun way to explore our area with fresh eyes and meet new people. Building supportive community is so important at this stage and something that I am constantly working on.
You’ve been very open about your journey with IVF and preeclampsia on Instagram. How have those experiences and now motherhood changed you?
Before I experienced infertility and IVF I just didn’t think twice about what the journey to having kids might look like. I just assumed, “Okay we want kids now, let’s do it, boom, it’s going to happen.” Of course it did not unfold that way and it took us a little longer than we expected to have a baby.
I’m now much more empathetic to every parent who has had their own unique journey to having their child. I am much more aware of the pain, sacrifices, and time it takes some to conceive whether that is on your own or through a surrogate.
As for my experience with preeclampsia - it was scary. I am more focused now on raising awareness about it on social media and within my own IRL circles. I’m grateful to the person who shared a story about preeclampsia on their Instagram Story a few years ago; this is how I learned about it and how I felt confident in advocating for myself and my body while at the hospital. It saved my life. You never know whose life you will impact by sharing important information and personal stories like this.
How is your dog, Bowie, adjusting to life with a toddler?
Bowie was a little unsure at first of what was going on – he kept his distance, understandably! But now, Lily and Bowie are just the cutest together. They love each other. Lily gets very excited when Bowie runs into the room she is in. She’s even learned how to “throw” his toys for him to play fetch with. Bowie loves to give her all the kisses. And he loves hanging out under her high-chair. :) We’re so happy that they get along. Bowie was our first baby, after all.
These days Bowie loves hanging out under Lily’s high chair.
We love your passion for fiction. Have you ever considered writing your own novel?
I would love to write my own novel one day! I’ve brainstormed a few ideas but I haven’t landed on an idea I love just yet. I love historical fiction (like Maggie O’Farrell’s books), fantasy (I love A Court of Thorns and Roses), and I’ve recently gotten into mysteries (I loved The Sicilian Inheritance). A combination of these would be my dream novel to write. I have so much admiration and respect for authors. Finding the motivation to write is one of the hardest things!
What are the top five books you’ve read this year?
If someone in our community wants to build their own small business, how can they get started?
I am a big fan of talking about it with others as a way to test out your idea. Gather as much feedback as possible. Take baby steps and create small experiments to “validate” your ideas before pouring a ton of time, energy, and money into it.
Once you have conviction in your idea, and hopefully some initial paying customers, one practical step you can take is legal: create an LLC or a C-corp. (There are other types, too, like an S-Corp.) Investing in a lawyer who can help you navigate these - setting up your business, setting up basic contracts, and so on - will pay dividends in the long run.
One thing I regret not doing in starting my first business was not having a business partner alongside me. It is *so* much work to build your own business – it’s worth identifying your strengths and weaknesses, and finding a partner who can truly complement you and be along for the ride for many, many years to come.
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